Ok, now I'm scared.

I guess if you're gonna give someone a crash course in How To Be A Megalo-maniacal Unilateralist While Simultaneously Using The CIA To Subvert Everyone On The Planet, you can't do much better than ol' Hank Kissinger himself.

Look how happy she is! She has no idea she's sitting next to a mass murderer!

Worst Case Scenarios, Part 9

Millions of teenage boys are super hella glad that tomorrow morning they're not gonna wake up and be this kid.

Last week, he was banging the governor's daughter and drinking PBR in his truck on the way to the river.

This week he's:

-engaged

-infamous

-headed to the Republican National Convention to present a united front with his fiancee and his future in-laws, who are only being cool to him because they can't kick his ass without getting in trouble.